Thinking . . .

I will get back to our everyday adventures with updated info on what has been going on in our lives since Christmas.  But today I have been thinking.  I have been thinking about the twins that Mike and I had planned to adopt.  I have been thinking about how today is their birthday and they turn 8.  Had they been placed with us, we would not only be celebrating their birth, but had their baptism planned. JR turns 7 on Saturday, and I am already getting emotional thinking about him getting baptized next year.  How crazy to think about what things may have been like had the twins really been ours.  I never met them, I do not even know what their names are, but I know that I will continue to wonder about them.  Do they go to church?  Does their mom teach them the things they need to know to be happy? Will they have an eternal family one day, like I do?  It doesn't hurt so much talking about it and even thinking about it.  If I go back and read (relive) what we went through it still hurts, but I can talk about it and think about it with a lot less pain then before. Even though I knew today was coming, I didn't really think about it until late this afternoon.  Maybe that was part because I am 8 months pg and in full on nesting mode along with the exhaustion that comes at the end of pg.  When I think of my family now, I am still amazed that I already have 3 beautiful children and will soon have 4.  Sometimes I wonder if all 4 of my kids would even be here, had those twins been placed with us.  I know I will never know, and maybe I shouldn't try to think about it, but I know I would not change my family for anything.  I am so blessed with what I have.  But those twins that were almost mine, will always be a part of my heart.  Even though the pain of their loss is not so tender anymore, because my heart is full with all that I have been blessed with.

Christmas

This is going to be a Christmas photo dump, because that is really all I have time for.

First snow of the season, the kids love playing in it.  We have gotten more, but it usually melts pretty fast.  This first time it stayed long enough for some real play.

The day after thanksgiving we put up the tree, and the few decorations we have.  The kids love it.

We saw Santa at our Branch Christmas party.

AJ didn't really want to sit.  Annie wouldn't sit on his lap at all.

The kids had fun decorating gingerbread houses.

Christmas Eve, the kids opened up new pjs.  The boys got star wars Annie has Hello Kitty.

After Santa arrived.

Annie received a Dora dollhouse.

AJ received lightsabers and a dinosaur/car toy.

JR received lightsabers and Ninjago legos. 

Christmas day, we spent opening gifts and playing with new toys. So many of my pictures turned out blurry, the kids just wouldn't stay still.

All in all, the kids had a great Christmas and they were spoiled as usual, especially by grandparents.  It was fun.

Halloween

The kids had a good Halloween.  We were invited to a friends house, who has a great neighborhood for trick or treating.  The kids did really well walking around, except Annie had to be carried the whole time.  I didn't get any pics of them actually trick or treating, but it was a fun night and they all got a lot of candy.  Here is a photo dump of our Halloween.

Butterfly

Flying Butterfly

All dressed up

Power Ranger without his mask

Robin

Power Ranger with the mask

Carving pumpkins

Love this face

JR

AJ

Annie

Ready to trick or treat